In season 2 of Insecure, we see Issa has a heauxtation going on. From meeting up with random dudes on Tinder to sexing ‘neighbor bae,’ this awkward Black woman is feeling liberated or perhaps trying to. I’m definitely here for it…all of it!

After justifiably cheating on Lawrence (yes, it is justified) with Daniel, taking a break and just getting hers may be the best thing for Issa. I mean, she held ‘Mr. jobless f’boy Lawrence’ down for 2 years. So, she deserves to pop it for pimp…OKAY!

Lemme tell you why the ‘heaux phase’ is essential…

No commitment:

As women, we tend to commit to guys who aren’t our boyfriends just because he’s nice or consistent. Commitment takes energy and sometimes it isn’t reciprocated.

With the heaux phase, you can get yours and leave and simply commit to enjoying yourself. There’s no added pressure, false expectation, and minimizes feelings being hurt.

Options:

You’re not married or together and there’s no need to act like it. In this phase, you learn the importance of having options. If you want 2 or 22 (no judgment, sis), it’s your prerogative. Options teach you not to settle and relentlessly go for who and what you want.

Teaches You to be Selfish:

The heaux phase teaches you not to give so much of yourself, if you don’t want to. If you don’t want to call him back, be there for him, or consider his feelings—you don’t have to. It doesn’t make you a bad person; it makes you a person with boundaries. You learn the importance of self-care, as it relates to dealing with people.

If you’re lucky, you may end up with a Daniel during your phase. But, that’s really a bonus. The true prize is doing things on your own terms.

Go on and live, sis!

Courtey of LaJanee Crosby